I don’t generally dedicate a whole post to a single testimonial. But I don’t always get to see what happens to a project when I’m done with it… and this writer was so kind and generous with his feedback and updates that I just had to share.
How It Started
He had a strong concept and characters already in place.
I didn’t have to change a lot structurally… all the basic story points were there in the right order, but they were more story than plot. So it was a matter of finding a stronger dramatic arc, amping up an existing story element into a true subplot that introduced a MacGuffin to drive the momentum, and making things organically build in ways that felt cinematic and interdependent.
I focused on improving pacing by getting into scenes later and exiting them earlier. Removing hyper-specific descriptive prose also helped move the reader along at a dramatic clip.
The concept is a mockumentary and depends on a lot of real-world research that was delivered through expository dialogue. We could wrap some of that into “interview” sessions, but it was still tough to integrate smoothly without sounding like a Ted Talk or a dissertation. So I worked hard on tightening up the dialogue to remove or soften expository passages to keep everything engaging and dramatic.
In the end, we got a much-improved screenplay that really delivered on the promise of his existing work.
What Happened Next
Because I stayed in touch with the client, I got to see how the improved screenplay performed in subsequent competitions.
- Advanced to SLAMDANCE SEMI-FINALS
- Advanced to SLAMDANCE QUARTER-FINALS
- Advanced to Round Two — Top 20% — at Austin Film Festival
I love rewriting as much or more than I love writing… so this was a fun project and super satisfying.
On to the next one!
“I recently consulted with Chip on my spec. psychological thriller screenplay and it was by far the best move I could’ve ever made.
He provided me with almost 20 pages of amazing notes covering pacing, genre, character arcs, description, dialog, narrative, structure on each act and refined act structures to improve the script.
What I received far exceeded my expectations and Chip proved beyond a doubt to have a solid understanding of all these elements and more.
In fact, his feedback was so incredible and his grasp of the subject matter so profound, that I ended up asking him to join me in the actual re-write process. So glad that he agreed.
In less than 30 days we pounded out a solid new draft, trimming the page count from 118 to 100 and vastly improving every aspect of the final work: scene headings, slug lines, action sequences, pacing, exposition, dialog, characterization… everything was improved as a result!
I should also add that I’ve been screenwriting for over 15 years and two of my scripts previously reached the quarterfinal round in the Nicholl Fellowship. I’m hoping that with any luck, this new script advances even further in this year’s competition, having had Chip as a contributor.
— Jeff Warrick, writer / producer / director
Chip Street - Writey Guy 